Dutchman Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 All the ballrooms you rocked in are tore down all the bars you rocked in are tore down the hot chicks are now grandmothers the new guitar you bought in your 1st band is now considered vintage collectable your children are older than you where when you where touring now I really would need a sock in my jeans there’s some of mine!!! Feel free to add !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gtrdaddy Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 I know I’m old because my wife always wants to talk during sex. Last night she called me from a hotel. My wife and I were really very happy for twenty years, then we met... You know you’re old when you’re wife has to retake her drivers test. She got eight out of ten. The other two jumped out of the way. She’s really a great driver though. She hit a deer once, it was in the zoo. You know you’re old when your wife’s cooking is so bad, that the flies fix the screens. I haven’t spoken to my wife in years though. Really, I don’t want to interrupt her. I told our kids about the birds and the bees, they told me about my wife and the butcher... It’s real exciting when you both get old. My wife made me join her bridge club. I jump next Tuesday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tommy p Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 ...I look in the mirror. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamerhead Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 .....15W is plenty loud. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Scepter Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 When you fart dust~ 😆 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Haynie Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 8 hours ago, gtrdaddy said: I know I’m old because my wife always wants to talk during sex. Last night she called me from a hotel. My wife and I were really very happy for twenty years, then we met... You know you’re old when you’re wife has to retake her drivers test. She got eight out of ten. The other two jumped out of the way. She’s really a great driver though. She hit a deer once, it was in the zoo. You know you’re old when your wife’s cooking is so bad, that the flies fix the screens. I haven’t spoken to my wife in years though. Really, I don’t want to interrupt her. I told our kids about the birds and the bees, they told me about my wife and the butcher... It’s real exciting when you both get old. My wife made me join her bridge club. I jump next Tuesday. You are ready for prime time! Whose jokes are those? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gtrdaddy Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 1 minute ago, Steve Haynie said: Whose jokes are those? My hero, the one and only Mr. Dangerfield. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamerhead Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 1 hour ago, Dave Scepter said: When you fart and hope it's dust~ 😆 Fixed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Studio Custom Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Doing something you used to love to do is too much effort now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gtrdaddy Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 4 minutes ago, Studio Custom said: Doing something you used to love to do is too much effort now. That, or hurts too much afterwards! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disturber Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Going out drinking and bar hopping. I was a pro at this for so many years. Really, a pro. I could hold my liquer with the best of them. Could almost always do and think business when drunk. Represent, being out there. Worked in a cool biz for years. Out there several nights a week, representing. I stopped getting drunk 12 years ago when I became a father. I haven't stopped drinking. I love to drink. I just don't drink much these days. I stopped getting drunk because I could no longer lay in bed or in the sofa until two p.m. watching a movie, let the hangover wear off. I had a baby, I needed to be up at six. And a was irritated and angry when I had a hangover. I got so embarassed with myself when I became irritated on my son for crying, because I had a hang over. So I just stopped drinking, right there and then. Easy decision. But these days, I get so damn tired from alcohol these days. That makes me feel really old. It used to give me energy to stay up all night. Now it gets me tired (most of the time). So that is the reason I don't drink these days. I rather go to the gym our out running. And I like to be up early, to busy to sleep all day. Still like to drink though... one whiskey, perhaps two. Or two, three glasses of wine. A couple of evenings a week. But not more than that. I'm just not built for it anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polara Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 You walk by a club and they don't hand you a flyer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crunchee Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 ...you remember when Tree Fitty wasn't just a running joke on the HFC. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Scepter Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 1 hour ago, gtrdaddy said: That, or hurts too much afterwards! You know you're old when you used to look forward to eating hot chicken wings😆 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
princeofdarkness56 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Seems I watch the Weather Channel just for fun. When watching the History Channel I realize about 80% of what they are showing happened in my lifetime. Oh, and I avoid mirrors and having my picture taken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jfritts Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 The hair growing from your ears is longer than the hair on your head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willie G. Moseley Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Other Dangerfield "old" profundities: "I walked past the cemetery and two guys started chasing me with shovels." "I'm so old, to me, 'shootin' up' means the enema bag." "You know you're really old when your family talks about you in front of you...'Whaddaya wanna do with Pop?' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carl.B Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 When your wife's snoring put's you to sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crunchee Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 3 hours ago, hamerhead said: .....15W is plenty loud. I represent that! Ever since I bought HFC member Fractal's 18-watt Mojotone Marshall head clone build a few years back, I got rid of all my 50-watt+ amps, and bought a couple of VHT 18-watt TMB Marshall clone heads to replace them...plus I got 'em on clearance, and being cheap never goes out of style. I don't play away from home anymore, so it's all I really need. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thundersteel Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 When you notice wrinkles that weren't there yesterday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bruce919 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 when you start looking at the salad options on the menu instead of the burgers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carl.B Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 When you use your AARP card for the 4 pm early bird dinner specials! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
princeofdarkness56 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 1 hour ago, Jfritts said: The hair growing from your ears is longer than the hair on your head. I’m envious. Seems the hair that disappeared from my head is growing rather well on my back and ass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gtrdaddy Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 27 minutes ago, Carl.B said: When you use your AARP card for the 4 pm early bird dinner specials! ...or the 1PM matinee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Studio Custom Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 14 minutes ago, princeofdarkness56 said: I’m envious. Seems the hair that disappeared from my head is growing rather well on my back and ass. Pics or it didn't happen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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