Jump to content
Hamer Fan Club Message Center

Another open letter to my friends here at the HFC


Recommended Posts

I quit drinking heavily 14 years ago when I became a father. I still drink, but I very seldom get drunk. I was easy once I made my mind up. You can do it. I know 'cause I used to think the only way to drink was to get really really out of my head. No need for that any more.

Keep focused!!  🖤🖤🖤

  • Like 4
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Good luck man!  Just keep winning the day, and the rest will take care of itself. 

I've had to cut way back myself post stent.  Having CAD and seeing what only a few drinks do to my heart rate and for how long now that I can track such things was more than enough to drop back my casual drinking.   Still working on keeping it to a few when I play though.  Thankfully, we're gigging enough again that I am getting plenty of practice, and being sober again by the time we load out has greatly cut down on trips back to whatever bar to pick up the shit I forgot the night before.   

But yeah, after a few months of really keeping up with my BPM, it's worrying to see what even two drinks does to it.  I know smoking on and off in my 30s and the diabetes weren't doing me any favors, but I really wish I'd been a bit smarter about my drinking as well, particularly since I never really had the physical hook.  I was just used to doing it as part of what I did when I was out.  You're definitely doing the smart thing.  

  • Like 4
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)

Michael,

What you are doing is a very difficult thing, and more so doing it without help. There is no doubt in my mInd that you can do it! Know thar you will probably relapse and understand that it's ok, just start over again! Do consider getting some outside help, not just our cozy group, who will always be there for you, but some tough, no holds barred love. I'm pulling for you, when you get there your whole life will be different, and for the better. Hope to celebrate your sobriety with you!
arniez

Edited by ArnieZ
  • Like 4
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wow, your guy's support and love is overwhelming. I really appreciate it and I'm not going to let you guys down. I'm still on track, maybe even ahead of my plan. I get a little grumpy in the evening but nothing I can't handle. I made some lentil soup last night. My wife says it's the best I've ever made. I didn't grow the lentils but I grew some Asian greens I added to it from my garden(s). I can't pronounce it but it's called Chijimisai and Komaatsuma. Tastes like spinach. We can't grow the usual spinach here because of the heat. Thanks again for all the love. It means so much to me.  

  • Like 9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 6/5/2021 at 11:43 AM, hamerhead said:

He will on occasion now have an O'Doul's. Yuck.

There are some decent non alcoholic beers, O'Douls isn't one of them. Caliber is very tasty, I used to switch to those when I felt like having a few more but still had to play the last set then tear down the PA & Lights and drive home at ~3am.

  • Like 3
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Michael, thank you for being so open. I send you the best from over the pond, and if you need some motivation from Bavaria let me know - maybe some Wurstel?

 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I love your mention of the lentil soup... I'm very fortunate in not having felt addicted on anything but man I know so many who have had that battle. Very often they use their new "what do I do now?" "empty" time into things that help distract at first, then strengthen. You may have a secret gourmand inside you, and this will be the gift you give yourself: the time and space to explore.  You are a remarkably self-aware person, and if anyone can squarely look at themselves and say "Okay, step one..." it is you!

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 hours ago, Montelovesco said:

Michael, thank you for being so open. I send you the best from over the pond, and if you need some motivation from Bavaria let me know - maybe some Wurstel?

 

Wurstel - Hells yeah!! :lol:

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 hours ago, tomteriffic said:

Michael, good to see you're still after it and even better to see that you're filling that time well. Gudonya and if you need a buck up or straightening out, you know you can give me a holler.

Thanks Tom. The headaches were pretty severe last evening but I stayed the course. Still on track. I haven't taken any NSAIDS yet, just letting things happen. 

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Michael,

I feel you, brother. I too have suffered terrible losses within my family and I know how much it hurts. Everyone's loss and grief is an entirely personal experience and no one can crawl inside your head with you.

In October I will be 10 years sober. Diagnosed with an addictive personality I used alcohol and drugs to manage my physical and emotional pain. I should probably have died a few times as a result of my antics. My family was going to leave me and I lost my driver's license for a while. I did AA for a bit and took what I could use from it; for the last 9 years it's been me, my will power and the occasional visit to my shrink. I go to bars with friends and family, play music in bars, entertain in our home and watch all of the alcohol  marketing that invades our lives every hour of every day via mass media.

It's a journey; a marathon not a sprint. It's very difficult yet manageable. I'm always available should you need an ear.

Dave

  • Like 9
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 hours ago, rugby1970 said:

. I should probably have died a few times as a result of my antics.

Dave

I feel I can relate. Once I tried to climb up to a party on the 4th floor of a house, on the outside of a building. Once I woke up, litteraly on the other side of the planet, in Auckland New Zeeland, in a bed with a girl I did not know and I did not have a clue where I was, nor did I have a phone number or adress to where my luggage and friends where. Talk about being stranded (way before we all had cellular phones). I have been in taxis or cars in strange towns on my way to clubs or parties and have had no clue where I was or where we were going. I have done so much weird shit being drunk. So happy I left that behind me. Just trying to stay happy and looking forward to being with my family and friends.

Keep going Michael. Like Dave says, you got to work on it everyday. I just learned how to breathe properly, through my core. I work on that everyday. Lots of things to work on. Keeps me focused!

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Only drank 4 beers last night and no weed at all. Zero. I've unloaded a couple tons of soil for my gardens in the past few days one shovel at a time so my muscles were all tight and restless all night. I didn't sleep well which is strange because I was really tired before bed and thought I'd drift right off. I had to get up and pee a few times while I was rolling around trying to get comfortable, side to side, on my stomach, legs curled up, legs straight down, flip flopping, really annoying. Getting up to pee was weird. I never do that. I guess my body is healing itself. Blood pressure is low. It hasn't gone above 120+ over 84 or so. It's also been as low as 96/63. I don't know if I'm going to hold myself to 4 tonight. I really want to sleep and this was supposed to be a 6er week but that happened last week. Way ahead of schedule. Feeling positive. 

  • Like 11
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

I'm sorry I haven't replied to each of you personally. The response was overwhelming. I certainly didn't expect over 1k views on this thread. I hope to reply to each of you either through PM or on this thread. Thanks to all of you for your support and friendship.

Today is Father's Day. A bittersweet day for me. It's only been a little over two weeks since I started this thread and told you guys my plans. I can say that I have cut down on my intake a lot quicker than I thought I would but I seem to be stuck on the 5 or 6 a night thing. I think it may be because I just want to keep going and drinking every night. So I decided since I've cut my beer intake in more than half I may as well just quit all together. I figure Father's Day will be an easy day to remember when I had my last drink. We'll see how it goes. It's 7:10 and I'm about to have dinner. I'm going to try my best not to drink tonight. I don't think I'll have any DTs or issues since I've been on half or less for 10 days or so. 

Wish me luck. Happy Father's Day.

  • Like 8
  • Thanks 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Ting Ho Dung said:

I'm sorry I haven't replied to each of you personally. The response was overwhelming. I certainly didn't expect over 1k views on this thread. I hope to reply to each of you either through PM or on this thread. Thanks to all of you for your support and friendship.

Today is Father's Day. A bittersweet day for me. It's only been a little over two weeks since I started this thread and told you guys my plans. I can say that I have cut down on my intake a lot quicker than I thought I would but I seem to be stuck on the 5 or 6 a night thing. I think it may be because I just want to keep going and drinking every night. So I decided since I've cut my beer intake in more than half I may as well just quit all together. I figure Father's Day will be an easy day to remember when I had my last drink. We'll see how it goes. It's 7:10 and I'm about to have dinner. I'm going to try my best not to drink tonight. I don't think I'll have any DTs or issues since I've been on half or less for 10 days or so. 

Wish me luck. Happy Father's Day.

Good luck. You can do this. We’re all in your corner. 

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's nearly bedtime and made it with no beer or weed. Been a bit agitated so went outback and finally got the male Cuban tree frog off my bull frog's back. He's been there like a parasite for a week. Little bastard looks like that character in a movie, "My Precious...."

No photo description available.

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, in one word, That sucked balls. I don't know how to describe how I feel. Tired and sore maybe. Horrible night sleep. Had to get up and pee several times again for some reason. My body must be doing something. Adjusting for this event maybe. Even with all the drinking I didn't have to pee in the middle of the night very often if at all. Last night I must have been up 3 times and each time was a big stream like a morning piss. Weird. I didn't drink any water or anything since dinner. Went to bet at 11:PM. Twitched and tossed around. I think I fell asleep for maybe 10 minutes because the first pee came at 11:32 and my body felt all tight and I couldn't go back to sleep for a while. All night was filled with dreams and I tossed and turned. I got up at 5:45 and pissed again. I finally got some decent sleep between 6 and 8:19 when my wife came back in our room and said she was going to work. I told her I had to drive her in because I needed the car. I'm getting some ducks this week for the pond :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, Ting Ho Dung said:

It's nearly bedtime and made it with no beer or weed. Been a bit agitated so went outback and finally got the male Cuban tree frog off my bull frog's back. He's been there like a parasite for a week. Little bastard looks like that character in a movie, "My Precious...."

No photo description available.

Is that maybe the only spot where he's safe from being eaten by the bullfrog?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

43 minutes ago, burningyen said:

Is that maybe the only spot where he's safe from being eaten by the bullfrog?

Valid point. However the Cuban tree frogs are breeding now and this is a breeding pose. The other 16 male Cubans have been hanging out on the rim or in the pool. Just so you know, the Cuban tree frog is an invasive species. The bullfrog is native. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...