Lockbody Posted June 8, 2006 Posted June 8, 2006 So I get through with my lab quickly and flip on the wireless adapter of the laptop to check the ol' HFC and I browse this thread..."Bob, I didn't realize configuring Class-Based Weighted Fair Queueing was that funny." - said the instuctor.True laugh out loud stuff.
JohnnyB Posted June 8, 2006 Posted June 8, 2006 "Hirsute." Fuggin' college-boy... Learned that one here at Playboy, not in college. Just enter "hirsute" in Google images with all filtering off. Don't need no college to feed a hirsute fetish.
Jack C Posted June 8, 2006 Posted June 8, 2006 I learned a long time ago not to read any messages posted by Rechts when I'm on business calls. Today I forgot that rule and had to try to explain why I was laughing at really inappropriate times.
sirDaniel Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I'm giving Greg my vote because he has humorical longevity and consistency on his side, and I've have spit on my monitor more from him then anyone.And a split vote for Badger and MCC because for HFC VI I had to endure their humor for 2x20 hour car trips in one wknd.
kizanski Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I think Kiz probably has a bunch, but I doubt he is in the mood to do me any favors.BTW, I'd nominate Kiz as funniest HFCer, myself. You're right. I save everything, and since I have always been a RECHTS Fan (I always felt that "RECHTS" [like HEMIBIRD] should always be typed in all CAPS), I made sure to save all of your stuff. Funny is funny, and even though you've been pretty much a shit to me in the recent past, your early works are simply too good to keep all to myself just to be spiteful and prevent you from having them back. Maybe the heart of the Grinch will grow 10 sizes again. Maybe some day. Thanks for the nomination, by the way, if it was in fact a genuine one. We both know my skills (both prose and graphic) were never a match for yours. Some of the n00bs might need some explanation, so here goes: Poe used to be heavy. He unleashed his hunger on Tokyo. The Unofficial Poe-a-palooza 1 Flyer. Me + Percocet + Vicodin = I don't remember what this was about, but it's still funny. Me, working as Spidey Joe's Manservant. ...and speaking of Joe... When the Korina/Alpep vs. Mahogany/BCR Juniors Debate kicked up a lot of dust, RECHTS weighed in.
kizanski Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Continued.... Nightwolf urged us all to take the High Road (but few of us listened, so he left. Twice.). Update: I just found out that this isn't a RECHTS, but fukkit - I'm leaving it anyway. Things got political, as they often do. RECHTS' suggestion for new HFC Emotcons. Even BTMN was not safe. RECHTS missed HFC VI, but he still made a contribution.
Rockola Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Remember the Newport Pro posts? Hark!I plucked sweet laughing roses from the spray,Wherewith the world wears on its warring wayI would not struggle with this spell, my lords'Tis true, forgivenesss is fleeting as the relentless harpies bend mine branches yet againBut they who strive with thought can tell how vain, how sad mine strife.I am as frayed as a sharkfin plectrum following an evening’s discourse of Byrd’s medleys.Have I not suffered torments and despair,Yea, all the agonies of living death in one day?Have they not penned me far from all noblest intention, and anguished me with misery of dread,Of dread most dreadful, lest, because my tongue refused with Judas-words to minister to their foul thirst for blood?The hellish might of angered tyranny should wreak its threatened vengeance on mine mournful brow!Have I not endured, with voice deliberate and rigid smile, the slings and arrows of sleepless vengeance?I know not what afflicts this coterie, what cankers this parish?Of falsehoods clustered round some unkind truth,Perhaps some half-imagined trifling slight, or tis envy of my Deizel amplification and my marbled SS? These comforts and joys rendered unto me by Our God as rewards for mine dedication to the leasing of the back-hoe and the iron hand-cranked toilet serpent?Newbies! Virgins! Here my cry!Sorrowful thou now knowest why!Woe throbbest within my breast, murmuring at mine lot, cursed as the spider in a storm-drain, or the hapless squire whom ill-rendered image of the crimson lute, in the tempestuous bazaar known as “eBay”.Great stuff, man.
Craig Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I haven't seen that stuff in years. Can someone repost the Saxon (Turdus) flaming golf shot just for kicks? That one always gave me a smile. Thanks for the laughs everyone!
Turdus Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 My sense of fashion has greatly improved. This one is about 6 years old now.
Travis Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I thought about making some sarcastic "complaint" about me not being on there. Of course, my random dick and fart (and big titty) jokes just dimply don't warrant a nomination. After reading some of these posts and seeing some of the old photoshops (without being in on the joke the first time around) I can honestly say I haven't laughed this hard in a very long time. We need more shit like this around here.
Jack C Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 The towel. Damn. It may have been the funniest gag I've seen on this board. It still makes me bust out laughing.
edgar_allan_poe Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Damn...seeing this stuff make me realize just how much I miss the old days. I would welcome having Rechts rip me to pieces any day of the week. The dude has a "rapists wit"...LOL!!!Nobody was safe from his wrath, and we would all come to the site to see who his next victim was going to be.(Poe starts chant..... RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS RECHTS)
MCChris Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I thought about making some sarcastic "complaint" about me not being on there. Of course, my random dick and fart (and big titty) jokes just dimply don't warrant a nomination. After reading some of these posts and seeing some of the old photoshops (without being in on the joke the first time around) I can honestly say I haven't laughed this hard in a very long time. We need more shit like this around here. I still feel like throwing a hissy fit that the only person on the list with fewer votes than me is Haynie (I guess I just did LOL) but it's clear that Rechts is the all-time king. The problem is, he's so good that he flat-out vaporizes the opposition and they crawl away utterly defeated, never to return again.He needs a new foil (other than Platzer, of course). SirDouglas might make for some good action, but his upcoming intercontinental move might prevent him from engaging Rechts as often as we'd like.Hellrider has potential.
Travis Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I will volunteer to be the next victim if it means there will be more shit like this on the board.
edgar_allan_poe Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I would love to see Hellrider try to hang with Rechts...ROTFLMAO!!
MCChris Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 I will volunteer to be the next victim if it means there will be more shit like this on the board. No, it has to happen organically.If only it had been Rechts instead of Jack who caused Hellrider to launch into that personal attack a couple days ago.
BillW Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 There have been funny ones ... but the HFC towel takes the cake by far. It didn't need to be targeted at any one, heck, it could have been any of us but man ... I thought that one was pure genius. And yes, I do remember him hammering AnDy relentlessly at every opp, and sometimes it seemed bordering on brutal (as Ed might say "Kind of like listening to his music!") but it sure was funny. Makes me want to piss him off just to see what he does to get at me.
Rechts Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 pAnZy provided those "every opportunities" that had me hammering away at him. Almost all my jabs were responses to a thread or a post that he initiated. He actually came on here once and said he and his band were writing a song about what an asshole I am, and I simply answered that I was doing the same....and I just whipped up those lyrics on the spot.I am surprised no one mentioned Buzzy Fret's fabulous Photoshop work about the thread that wouldn't end, and was seen floating out in space. That guy has real Adobe skills, not this half-assed guerilla cut&paste crap that I do.By the way, it's not that I need someone to be angry at, but there are some characters here that just provide a natural muse. Poe was always fun...I forgot that I broke his balls more than just about anybody.As for SirDouglas, the only cut&pasting I want to do is to his face, for getting mixed up in something that is none of his business. But I see he is running away to Japan now to avoid having to meet me in person at next NAMM, where he has promised to throw my 235 pound body off a balcony...Anyway.... good times, good times.Edited to add: The towel was just a response to the silly amount of male attention that Pam's appearance garnered back in the day, and was not directed at anyone specifically.
MCChris Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Edited to add: The towel was just a response to the silly amount of male attention that Pam's appearance garnered back in the day, and was not directed at anyone specifically. LOL! That's the funniest thing you've posted yet!
edgar_allan_poe Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Poe was always fun...I forgot that I broke his balls more than just about anybody.And I loved every second of it. I never took it personal and it always made me laugh.To this day, I don't know what I ever did to raise your ire to the point where you threw me under the bus like you did. (not the photoshop stuff....you know what I am referring to.) But I would be *more* than willing to let bygones be bygones if it would bring the old, fun, Rechts back.
Rechts Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 Edited to add: The towel was just a response to the silly amount of male attention that Pam's appearance garnered back in the day, and was not directed at anyone specifically. LOL! That's the funniest thing you've posted yet! Actually, there was a photoshop that I did that was directed at one of Pam's over-eager fans, but only a few people (including Pam) know about it. I didn't post it on here because I like the guy, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings.But I couldn't resist goofing on him privately! I'm a dick like that.This trip down memory lane has been fun, but I now have Irish Alzheimer's. I only remember the grudges. Maybe I should post this on the "Not getting any younger" thread.
Guest pirateflynn Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 This trip down memory lane has been fun, but I now have Irish Alzheimer's. I only remember the grudges. That's a damned shame.............but hey, at least I finally had a glimpse of the RECHTS that I have heard so much about. Cheers brother!
pesocaster Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 y'all should just let it go.... life is too damned short.....
edgar_allan_poe Posted June 9, 2006 Posted June 9, 2006 y'all should just let it go.... life is too damned short.....He can't...his boys would never speak to him again. Brooks and MCC...those bastions of BCR...right...so sad.
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