What are the ugliest Hamer models?

[zorrow]

I saw in the FS sale some people saying the Monaco was an ugly model. I personally think the contrary, but well... that's what tastes are for.

Anyway, the comment got me thinking about the ugliest Hamer model I've ever seen. I'm coming with one strong candidate:

The Blitz with paddle headstock:

What's yours?

[atquinn]

I love you man, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to go with Vector with the paddle headstock.

-

Austin

[Brooks]

ahh, this thread is an oldie but a goodie.

*disclaimer; no hamers were harmed in this thread, this is all in fun, YMMV, yada yada;

1) PHANTOM (great guitar but ughh, the *worst* looking)

2) PROTOTYPE (almost as bad; any high end guitar w/ a pickguard should be ashamed of itself)

3) SCARAB (but cool in a hairband kinda way, extra ugly points for goofy neon graphics)

4) ECLIPSE (but cool in a jetsons/utilitarian kinda way)

5) SS1 (almost cool, yet still ugly enough to mention; extra ugly points for homemade refin)

almost forgot these two rare birds (sorry toby); TLE & VIRTUOSO (sexy doubleneck, tho)

these are so rare they almost don't count, yet so ugly they must be included;

monacos & mirages are not ugly (although ten years ago i used to pretend mirages were because it pissed HHB off, ha).

blitz & vectors are fine, tho i prefer hamers more original designs to their gibson/fender clones.

as for cheap finishes and modifications, any decent looking hamer can be made ugly;

[Disturber]

Virtuosos are the ugliest guitars Hamer ever made. They are so ugly they only look normal on Uli Roth, the ugliest player on earth.

Mirages aren't that attractive either, but seem like great guitars and I'd like to have one.

Other ugly guitars Hamer made are the ones for lefties. Look at a leftie Sunburst for instance, it looks so weird, lol

Personally I think that a Blitz with 3x3 headstock looks cool. It's instant 80's Billy Gibbons to me. I'll take 'em all, just send them over.

[Thundernotes]

Anything in baby-poop yellow like this Centablo:

A close second would be the headstocks on the first gen Cruisebasses. Hideous.

[Hackubus]

The B4A/B12A bass is so ugly that it's cool.

[hardheartedbill]

Scarab by a mile

[zorrow]

I love you man, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to go with Vector with the paddle headstock.

-

Austin

Great man. If you love me in spite of any look-related issue, that's actually true love!

[atquinn]

Also, while it might be a bit, umm, unique, I don't see how anyone can hate on the Eclipse. It's a very elegant, functional design. I suppose that, like the Mirage, it's one of the guitars that looks better once you play it

-

Austin

[BubbaVO]

Scarab = fugly.

[G Man]

Apparently this one, because I can't seem to get anyone to show any interest in it whatsoever, even after being on the market for several months.

[polara]

Scarab, hands down. Brooks pretty much nailed the lineup. I want to like the Eclipse but the extra-deep cutaway looks like a basement bandsaw design. The Scarab looks like a drunk hair farmer had a bandsaw, a brainstorm and an Explorer.

As much as I love my two Phantoms and think they may be the most versatile, playable solidbodies ever...they are an acquired taste aesthetically.

[cynic]

The Phantom and Virt both look like silly putty strats to me, they've just been pushed/pulled differently but both came out pretty ugly.

Oh, and I can't look at the Eclipse without thinking about clitoral/prostate stimulation. That bottom horn is just creepy.

My easy answer is any Hamer product that isn't very closely modeled after a previous design from another company is more ugly than attractive. I'm not sure the Newport falls into the "previous design" category as well as others, so I'll make that my lone exception.

[gtone]

Sorry Zorrow, I quite like that Blitz with the paddle headstock - color combo is bodacious.

+1 on the Scarab for butt ugliness, however.

[Brooks]

I want to like the Eclipse but the extra-deep cutaway looks like a basement bandsaw design. The Scarab looks like a drunk hair farmer had a bandsaw, a brainstorm and an Explorer.

Oh, and I can't look at the Eclipse without thinking about clitoral/prostate stimulation. That bottom horn is just creepy.

a-HAAAA!!!

[Steve Haynie]

Thought to self... If these guys keep bashing the Scarab it could make prices go down... We can always point to this thread to prove our point... What do I really want? Hmmm...

Gosh, guys, you know those Impact basses are ugly as hell. No one should ever want to be seen playing one of those.

[Brooks]

Apparently this one, because I can't seem to get anyone to show any interest in it whatsoever, even after being on the market for several months.

ya know, the prototypes upper horn isn't too gumby looking. that one would prolly look badass w/o the pickguard. are there unsighly routes under there? maybe a see thru plexi guard would help. maybe its just me, but pickguards scream "cheap guitar", and the prototype doesn't actually need one (rear routed controls, & pups mounted in rings).

[serial]

3+3 Blitz or Vector

Mirage (ugh-fugliest in Koa-yuk!)

Eclipse

Scarab

Diablo

[carfish7]

Apparently this one, because I can't seem to get anyone to show any interest in it whatsoever, even after being on the market for several months.

ya know, the prototypes upper horn isn't too gumby looking. that one would prolly look badass w/o the pickguard. are there unsighly routes under there? maybe a see thru plexi guard would help. maybe its just me, but pickguards scream "cheap guitar", and the prototype doesn't actually need one (rear routed controls, & pups mounted in rings).

Like this? Funny thing - it is the very same guitar!

[veatch]

You're all on crack. An ugly guitar? I'm a friend of all guitars.

...

Except the Scarab...

[triodecr]

My vote is for the Scarab, especially this one:

http://www.ebay.com/itm/80s-HAMER-SCARAB-made-USA-/120818305097?pt=Guitar&hash=item1c21550849#ht_3440wt_1313

[TobiTill]

With Scarabs there's definitely room for improvement.

The white Blitz comes close to the looks I'd want for my ultimate metal guitar.

Add a black Floyd and you are there.

Too bad I don't play metal and have no use for Floyds...

[cspot]

Thats it....I'm starting a scarab fan club! Who's with me! C'mon folks...anyone?.... Helloooo....is this thing on??

[BubbaVO]

Oh, and I can't look at the Eclipse without thinking about clitoral/prostate stimulation. That bottom horn is just creepy.

I believe your life experience significantly differs from mine because your observation would not ever have occurred to me. LOL!

[crunchee]

Oh, and I can't look at the Eclipse without thinking about clitoral/prostate stimulation. That bottom horn is just creepy.

I believe your life experience significantly differs from mine because your observation would not ever have occurred to me. LOL!

+1. I always thought of the Eclipse as having a Special style horn on the bass side, and a early '60's (non-SG) Melody Maker horn on the treble side. Or maybe it was borrowed from the SS series. Ennyhoo, my concept of this guitar has now completely changed, thanks to Cynic...I can never watch 'Attack of the 50-Foot Woman' the same way again.